Revisiting Old Daemons

I wrote this a couple of years ago, when I finally had the courage to come out (for a second time) as a man fighting an eating disorder. After I posted it to Twitter this evening in response to an @AgainstSuicide tweet about eating disorders (without much thought really, hoping just that my account of my struggle could help someone else), I started revisiting the issues of eating disorders and suicide prevention and figured it time to repost my own perspective.

The insidious thing about having an eating disorder — especially as a male, where the stigma is even greater (though no more significant; women and men suffer — and harm themselves — just as equally) — is that stigma it carries. I’ve come out twice — as gay (I’ve written about that on this site) and also as bulimic; the second was much more difficult. Even worse, eating disorders and depression often walk Meg Ryan-Tom Hanks style hand-in-hand. Both are your friends, your guilty pleasures and your worst enemies. They will kill you without a second thought if you let them, and you still can’t talk about them with anyone but a licensed professional without consequences. So they eat at you like no Walking Dead thing can. I only hope by sharing the pain and emotional death having an eating disorder brings one, there’s the possibility I can help someone else.

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~ by Benji on 9 January 2015.

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