My Mates

1) I’m open to making new mates, friends, acquaintances — whatever you want to call a relationship between two people on good terms with each other and willing to share personal information with each other — at all times in all situations. I’m not necessarily good at initiating conversations which could lead to that process, though at the same time I rarely will them away unless I have a reason to. Reasons to stop such potentially amicable conversations will include any type of slur, be it sexist, racist, homophobic, xenophobic, etc. — you get the picture. In Ben’s world, we’re all equal people pursuing our own vision not of the American dream, but whatever dream we wish to dream, provided it doesn’t impede the dream of anyone else.


2) So we’re clear on that. My mates come from everywhere on this planet, encompass many ethnicities, all sexualities, all economic realities, all interests — some of those I value most are the ones who introduce me to interests: music, theater, movies, cuisine, I never would have encountered without the magic of the internet-machine. You all know how much I love Arsenal Football Club, and just being an Arsenal fan has led to finding mates on every continent but Antarctica. I have mates in Israel with whom I speak in German about German philosophy, mates in Taiwan with whom I can discuss Arsenal’s transfer strategy, mates who can (and may, please) text me in the morning about the state of indie rock. It’s wonderful.


3) is the most important one — if I refer to you as “mate” or, more commonly in the USA as “friend,” I establish in my mind a bond between you and I, whereby we’re mutually bound to share with and support each other no matter what. Obviously there’s a sort of hierarchy to this, as in “family comes first.” It means that I will do whatever I can in my power to do what is best for you — it doesn’t mean if you were to hypothetically be accused of murder, I’d without question back your account; it means that I’d give the most honest testimony I could to the state as a defense witness; what’s best for you in that kind of situation is a full and complete recounting of my knowledge of what happened. 

My mates are my mates. I hold to you as Donald Trump holds to his pounds and his dollars (pun intended). If I call you mate, the above is what I promise you from me. It’s a pact sealed in nothing but loyalty, the only currency that is purely unadulterated. 

~ by Benji on June 8, 2013.

One Response to “My Mates”

  1. Loyalty is a much under-rated thing you know. Something I have always appreciated about our son – he is loyal to a fault. I also love the word “mates” meaning friends – a British term that really works for me. It implies a level of comfort, trust, and yes – loyalty. I am SO happy to consider myself one of your mates!


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